22 replies to this topic

[annasea]

December 1st
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd at the Radisson Hotel and Suites. There will be lots of spiked eggnog and a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus to light the Christmas tree! Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10. Merry Christmas to you and your family!

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
December 2nd
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is holiday that often coincides with Christmas (although unfortunately not this year). However, from now on we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to employees who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols sung. Happy Holidays to you and your family!

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

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December 3rd
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Regarding the anonymous note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, I'm happy to accommodate this request, but, don't forget, if I put a sign on the table that reads, "AA Only", you won't be anonymous anymore. In addition, forget about the gifts exchange -- no gifts will be allowed since the union members feel that $10 is too much money.

Patty Lewis, Human Researchers Director

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December 7th
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I've arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with the gay men; each will have their table. Yes, there will be a flower arrangement for the gay men's table. Happy now?

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

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December 9th
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

People, people! Nothing sinister was intended by wanting our CEO to play Santa Claus! Even if the anagram of "Santa" does happen to be "Satan", there is no evil connotation to our own "little man in a red suit."

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

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December 10th
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

Vegetarians ... I've had it with you people!! We're going to hold this party at the Radisson Hotel whether you like it or not, you can just sit at the table farthest from the "grill of death", as you put it, and you'll get the salad bar only, including hydroponic tomatoes. But, you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them! I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them right now... Ha! I hope you all have a rotten holiday! Drive drunk and die! DO YOU HEAR ME?!?!

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

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December 14th
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her stress-related illness. I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the sanitarium. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay. Happy Holidays!

Terri Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director

[drbill]

"Funny?" Well, not really of course. I am one who grew up with the tradition of Christmas celebrated in my house. However in a multicultural society like America, it is important that no one culture's (or religion's) traditions so completely dominate gatherings which include so many others. To celebrate Christmas and other religious traditions within a more homogeneous group (like a church congregation or religious group) is perfectly fine, but to overwhelm other cultural traditions with the traditions of one is not.

With that said, I'm in favor of celebrating the traditions of every culture in our society. This includes Hanukkah, Kwanza, Hindu holidays and maybe even those of Scientology (as long as I can continue taking my anti-depressants during the party). By doing so we may achieve my ultimate goal... a society in which work days are far outnumbered by holidays!!!

[Walter]

I disagree, Bill. While different religions must be respected and no one should ever feel pressured to participate in a religious event, I believe it is a mistake to try to be all things to all people.

While it's fine to keep alive traditions and celebrations from our homelands or the homelands of our ancestors, we need to recognize that we live in a land with cultures of its own. It is wrong for us to expect the majority to conform to beliefs we brought from another land. BTW, Kwanza was invented as an artificial celebration in California. The original joke is an excellent example of just how ridiculous the concept political correctness is.

There's nothing wrong with celebrating Christmas. If you are not Christian or don't want to participate, don't. Don't try to turn a Christmas celebration into a "Holiday" celebration. That is not inclusive, but rather it is exclusive of everyone. Do you prefer celebrating Hanukkah, Kwanza something else to Christmas? Go ahead, but it's a separate celebration.

[Latitude Adjustment]

Walter, I think Bill was trolling and you took the bait. We need that clickable smile with the tonge in cheek.

[sudsymark]

I was rolling on the floor laughing after reading this but it is a sad commentary on human nature when it's very close to what I have seen happen.

[annasea]

With that said, I'm in favor of celebrating the traditions of every culture in our society. This includes Hanukkah, Kwanza, Hindu holidays and maybe even those of Scientology (as long as I can continue taking my anti-depressants during the party).

LOL! Fat chance! Remember Katie's upcoming fate during childbirth, Bill!

Walter, I think Bill was trolling and you took the bait. We need that clickable smile with the tonge in cheek.

Ray, trust me, it wouldn't have made a difference.

[ScubaHawk]

Gotta go with Walter on this one - if you are offended by people celebrating the occasion, don't go to the party. If you want to celebrate a different occasion, throw your own party. If you just want to go party - go party. I'll go to a Christmas party, a Kwanzaa etc . . . I'll even have an Atheist party and sit around watching Coincidence on 34th Street.

[Walter]

Caetllon's right, I don't understand smilies.

[drbill]

Walter, I don't "believe" in smilies either. And, of course, I was largely tongue-in-cheek (or foot-in-mouth?). Historically we should keep in mind that even the tradition of Christmas was introduced to "America." Perhaps we should really be celebrating the "Native" American traditions instead? Of course even they introduced them to our continent from Africa by way of Asia. And then there are those, like my late former Harvard professor H. Barraclough Fell, who believed that many early cultures visited our continent long before the Pilgrims.

To celebrate Christmas the only holiday in public entities is not correct IMHO. It does impose one culture's traditions on all others. I don't think it is appropriate for newcomers to adopt "our" traditions if we are to truly be a multicultural society that values diversity.

I believe in Santa Claus and I know he is bringing me a new pony bottle, some new wings for my X-Tek BCD, an around-the-world dive trip including African and South American sites, and a brilliant, drop-dead gorgeous permanent dive buddy. You are, aren't you Santa?

[Walter]

I don't think it is appropriate for newcomers to adopt "our" traditions if we are to truly be a multicultural society that values diversity.

Why should we be a multicultural society? IMO, that concept keeps us as separate from each other. We need a focus that unites us. The multicultural concept is inherently harmful to us.

[ribbitz]

I received a nice long email today on this whole Christmas Issue. I've taken out the bit below to share with ya'll, not to cause a rukous or anything, just something else to think about...

No matter what happens to the Christmas holiday, I'm proud to see "Merry Christmas" displayed across the top of these forums!!

Remember this is from an email, and is not my word.

I noticed a few years ago that we changed the name of Abraham Lincoln's and George Washington's birthday so as to be all inclusive regarding the Presidents. Hark, if we should recognize anyone as exceptional. Now it's called Presidents' Day. Well, if we're going to be so all inclusive, next month I'll have to refer to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day as Civil Rights Leaders' Day. We don't want to exclude great Americans like Rosa Parks or Cesar Chavez, do we? And to think that Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton might be left out. We might need to change Mother's Day, Father's Day, and Grandparents' Day to All Parents' Day. Just lump them all together.

It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? So what's the difference?

My freedom to celebrate Christmas in the tradition of the Christian religion is as much my right as it is your right to be offended by it. So what are we going to do? Did anyone hear me . . . what are we going to do?

Do we defend a person's right to go forward with a time tested tradition (how about 2000 years?), or do we defend a person's right to end it all because they're offended? As long as we live in this great land and have the freedom to express ourselves and what we believe in, we will always offend someone.

If we try to make everything right for everyone, we won't have anything for anyone.

Bah, sorry your thread was hijacked Annasea... that was a funny one, made me laugh!!!

Edited by ribbitz, 08 December 2005 - 10:10 PM.

[annasea]

Bah, sorry your thread was hijacked Annasea... that was a funny one, made me laugh!!!

No worries, ribbitz. I'm surprised it's even gotten responses.

[Warthog]

Personally I'd just rather have my share of the $$ they spend on the 'Holiday' party.

Same goes for the little 'gifts' they give us twice a year (shirt, mug, mouse pad, etc.). I must have a dozen mugs with Co. logos on them

I don't go to work to make friends or get a free meal (I don't drink).

-Warthog, aka The Grinch

Edited by Warthog, 08 December 2005 - 10:15 PM.

[Walter]

Thanks for the post, ribbitz. Jost as a point of interest, the holiday referred to in the e-mail as
'President's Day" is still officially Washington's Birthday, although it is commonly called president's day. Quick trivia question - what other president's birthday is always a holiday and why?

[Warthog]

Thanks for the post, ribbitz. Jost as a point of interest, the holiday referred to in the e-mail as
'President's Day" is still officially Washington's Birthday, although it is commonly called president's day. Quick trivia question - what other president's birthday is always a holiday and why?

It'd have to be a fixed day like Christmas or 4th of July. However, I'd probably have heard about it for a major holiday. So I'm guessing something like 'Flag Day', but I have no idea who....FDR?