4 replies to this topic

[drbill]

No, I didn't get pregnant... or get married... or stop diving, but I've been away from SD since last October. Now that our lawyer is informing our estranged sister, I can explain why.

Back in October I was to meet Mom in Atlanta and fly up to Michigan for a family wedding. She called the day before and said her doctor told her she couldn't go, but she didn't know why other than that it was a medical concern. I arrived at my sister's in MI for my niece's wedding. We set a place for Mom next to me at our table. Then we learned that Mom had cancer and was going to be operated on. My sisters and I flew down to Florida to be with her when she went in for surgery.

Mom did well in recovery, insisting she be taken off her pain meds within two days. What a trooper. Unfortunately the news wasn't good. It had metastasized and was terminal. I elected to stay with Mom during her rehab and helped her when she got back home. I was extremely fortunate to be able to spend the last three months of her life with her, and my sisters flew down several times including Christmas when many of the family joined us. Mom's favorite time of the year. I had a good 2+ months of quality time with Mom, and made her final months much easier through my caregiving (poor thing, she even had to eat my cooking).

In mid-January she took a turn for the worse and passed on Jan 20th. We sensed it coming and were all at her bedside the afternoon and evening she expired. Sister Judy had the great idea to play her favorite music during Mom's last hours and we all toasted her with her favorite wine. I put a few drops on her lips as she was unresponsive.

Following her passing we tackled the estate and getting her condo straightened out. Mom said no services were to be held, but she didn't say anything about a party... so we invited all her many friends (a number of them dating back to her high school days!) to a Celebration of her life.

Each of us flew home in February, then returned in April and May to finish the task of the condo and her estate. So I've been away for most of the last 9 months and had very spotty Internet service while in Florida (thanks to Verizon... grrr).

Although I appreciate condolences, that is not the intent of this posting. I was incredibly fortunate to be able to spend that time with Mom. I consider that a tremendous gift as I never could have done it if I were something other than a divebum and had to sit in an office all day.

I didn't do a single dive while in Florida (Mom lived on the West Coast and diving the Gulf is not high on my list) so I only did 97 dives last year. Ever since I came home I've been diving as often as my wallet will let me. Good to be back.

[little mermaid]

So sorry to hear of your mom's passing, I totally agree with you that you gave her the best 3 months of both of your lives by being there, it is very difficult. You will never know how much that meant. Hugs to you. AND also HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you. I am sure your mom is looking down to you this day with a happy heart.

[WreckWench]

Dr Bill it is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo great to have you back with us. WE'VE REALLY REALLY REALLY MISSED YOU!

And you are right... life gives and takes and its never what we want or desire...but sometimes we make lemonaid out of the lemons and its just as it should be.

I am sad that God called another angel home but I'm thrilled that her son got to be with her... what a perfect completion to life. The very same son that she fed, clothed and bathed during the first part of his life...returned the gesture of love during the last part of her life.

And what a beautiful celebration of life that party must of been!

We ARE thrilled to have you back but we rejoice the time spent doing something so special.

Hugs from all of us at SD.... its great to have you back home!

[ScubaSis]

What an honor to have been able to spend that special time with your mother. No one ever wants these times to come.

Definitely glad to see you back!

[Sharklover]

Hi Bill, glad to have you back although I am fairly new here myself.

Very sorry to hear about your Mom's passing and I hope she did not suffer too much. I am struck with how lovely it was that you were able to spend that time with her and how you celebrated her life both while she was still here and after her passing. What a gift to you both. I lost my father in an accident when I was 23, and it was instant. Certainly I am glad that he didn't suffer, but what I would give for just a bit of time with him.

Hope you get to get back in the water soon!

AND

Very happy to hear that you didn't get pregnant.