7 replies to this topic

[TCdamsel]

I have over 500 dives. Ive dived almost all the bucket list places, the last before Covid was Tahiti. I had a near death experience in the Maldives that involved my sister in 2010 that Ive never gotten over. Then I traveled with people who didnt approve of my transgender daughter. Its been a series of bad things. Now when I look at my wetsuits I only feel dread. What used to bring me joy only brings me anxiety. Kamala was my angel in 2008 when I couldnt even figure out how to turn on my air. Just looking for input or guidance. Ellen

[MNJoe]

Ellen

 

Sorry to hear of your troubles.  I know the last year has had me in a dismal fog, sounds like you have had more than your fair share of difficulties over quite a few years.  I wish that I had some kind of miracle cure for you, but I do not.  I would make a new bucket list.  I do not know about your near death experience in the Maldives, I am assuming it is diving related.  So maybe your bucket list needs to be about other things than diving.  Give your self something to look forward to.  I know that I have to give myself a kick to do some of the activities I used to do. I am hoping the pandemic is nearing it's end so that we can all start to get back to our normal lives.  

 

Best of luck, I hope everything turns out okay for you.

 

Keith

[dive_sail_etc]

I have over 500 dives. Ive dived almost all the bucket list places, the last before Covid was Tahiti. I had a near death experience in the Maldives that involved my sister in 2010 that Ive never gotten over. Then I traveled with people who didnt approve of my transgender daughter. Its been a series of bad things. Now when I look at my wetsuits I only feel dread. What used to bring me joy only brings me anxiety. Kamala was my angel in 2008 when I couldnt even figure out how to turn on my air. Just looking for input or guidance. Ellen

Ellen this is such a tragic story; I'm so sorry for all you've been through.

 

Does your daughter usually travel and dive with you? Sorry I am not aware of that part of the equation.

 

If there is one thing I can say about the SD group I have never once encountered any sort of animosity or blowback regarding dive skills, life choices, anything like that. And we all know Kamala would not tolerate it on any of her trips!

 

I pray you find your way back to diving; one thing I do recall is how much you loved it.

[ginger.ninja]

TCDamsel-- I'm so sad that you had to go through so much, especially related to diving-- which is (in my mind) so peaceful and centering.  

You should do what feels best for you, but if you want to get back to diving (which it seems you do), have you thought about keeping yourself to a depth limit for the first 10-20-30 however many dives?  While obviously there are inherent risks to diving at any depth, some of my most amazing dive experiences have been at 15' or shallower. A divesite called "citris" is one of my favorite ever, and it was 10'- and not a ledge, or a wall, just a legit 10' reef impossible to get deep on.  It had amazing branch coral and THOUSANDS of tiny fishes darting all around. I could have been there for hours.  It felt like watching the fish version of NYC at rush hour. No current, not deco limit worries, no air checking (well, beyond vaguely checking that you're good), no safety stop, just pure joy of diving and the life of the reef. 

 

And if you want to join a group trip I'm on, I'm more than happy to room with you.  I'd love to hear more about your amazing daughter! 

 

Editing to add that a shore diving only trip to Bonaire might be perfect for you. You could shallow dive the house reef to your heart's content! Most afternoon's you'd be likely to find a willing buddy who went out in the morning and is happy to play around at shallow depths for the afternoon. 

Edited by ginger.ninja, 07 May 2021 - 04:28 PM.

[WreckWench]

Oh honey...I'm so glad to hear from you...and so sad to hear all you've been suffering thru. I do know that you are one of the strongest people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. So I know that when you decide to break thru that last barrier keeping you from finding your soul in the ocean again...you just need someone to hold your hand (figuratively and maybe physically) and you need to be in a caring, fun and supportive community and just like the first time...let yourself re-discover the joy of the water and the ocean.

 

You have been to so many magical places...and some of those magical places can also be a bit on the edge current wise...skill wise...etc. So maybe returning to someplace simple but fresh is a good opportunity for you. You know that if you ever want to go diving with us that we will take care of you just as we always have... even like the first trips.

 

And we have several "comfort trips" this year still on the calendar JUST for the reasons mentioned...getting back into the water in a safe and controlled environment with FRIENDS and genuinely kind people.  That has never changed in the 18 years we've been doing this. So while almost everything else in this world has changed... our group trips have not. They remain a constant and each one gets better and better as we all exit the covid nightmare.

 

So consider Bonaire in Aug or Cozumel in Sept or Roatan in Oct or Dominica in Dec. ALL of these are perfect for re-discovering diving in a safe, calm, and fun way. And yes I'll be your buddy if you like. It will be like the old days... and it will be my pleasure to share this amazing experience with you again! You know my own story of fear of water and my own near drownings...so I totally get it. You are ALWAYS welcome here! Hugs my dear sweet friend! kamala

[TCdamsel]

I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for the responses.  I can't thank y'all enough.  I knew in my heart that I just needed to come back here.  Funny thing, I have a friend who was trying to talk me into going to Costa Rica to do Ayahuasca with her in the fall. I think I'd rather be diving.... .  I love you Kamala!

[little mermaid]

 Ellen, so sorry to hear of your difficulties and suffering.  As everyone else has said very eloquently...... starting with an easy dive and being surrounded by friends would make a great avenue for getting back into the world you have loved.   I am sad for the judgmental people that ruined your experiences.  Know that you have friends and people who care about you and family.  Hoping that you look into some of the "comfort trips" Kamala suggested.  All have some awesome and inspiring places to find your water soul again.

 

Kathy  

[WreckWench]

I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for the responses.  I can't thank y'all enough.  I knew in my heart that I just needed to come back here.  Funny thing, I have a friend who was trying to talk me into going to Costa Rica to do Ayahuasca with her in the fall. I think I'd rather be diving.... .  I love you Kamala!

Just like old times! I'm so proud that we've grown but never changed!  And I'm glad you feel comfortable again hanging out with us cyberwise!  Check out our trips HERE and see if anything fits your schedule. We can take it nice and slow and easy. Just like we did when you first started. Our bedside manner has never changed!   I'd be honored and thrilled if you joined us again!

 

And I'm so proud of the amazing people who comprise this club! I've seen posts from members who have been here since the inception and from those who joined last week! WOW!! Now that's a great place to hang out! Hugs to you and to all those who have replied to you!