Need some input on a common message...
#1
Posted 09 May 2007 - 06:15 AM
"You're never at home and I need someone whose willing to stay at home with his family."
So some way some how (mostly by me telling them) the fact that I tend to not stay home comes out. And I get the response above (this is the third time). They don't bother asking me what I'm doing or how I'd feel about changing it they just assume I'd continue the same pace....
The simple fact is I'm never at home because I have no reason to be at home! I can currently choose between being unhappy at home sitting on my ass watching tv alone and going out training and in general enjoying my life. I choose to go out! Doesn't mean I won't choose to stay home WHEN I have a family!! $%#% QV#$POUT#Q )$
So ladies why the @#$@$@ do you want me to lead a married life when I'm single?
#2
Posted 09 May 2007 - 06:41 AM
Do what you want to do, when you want to do it. If someone cannot accept you and your life as it is then you have the wrong lady. Live your life for you, not for someone else. When you find the right one it will work and you will both be happy.Ok I've heard this 3 times now and am getting pretty damn frustrated...
Cheers.
Tech Support - The hard we do right away; the impossible takes us a little longer...
"I like ponies on no-stop diving. They convert "ARGH!! I'M GOING TO DIE" into a mere annoyance." ~Nigel Hewitt
#3
Posted 09 May 2007 - 07:39 AM
Hang in there!
#4
Posted 09 May 2007 - 07:40 AM
Ok I've heard this 3 times now and am getting pretty damn frustated...
"You're never at home and I need someone whose willing to stay at home with his family."
And where were these woman asking you this question, I'm guessing they were out too!
Other than Jehovah witnesses, they never come knocking on my door looking for a home body! Well there was this one time the day I was moving in that a neighoor and her very pregnant daughter came to welcome me to the neighborhood, the look on my fathers face was priceless!
By all that is wet, I do hereby swear, (politely), and attest, upon pain of never diving again, (real or imagined), that I understand and affirm, that I agree to the above.
_________________________________________(log in name signature)
Signed and Dated
#5 Guest_PlatypusMan_*
Posted 09 May 2007 - 08:00 AM
Ok I've heard this 3 times now and am getting pretty damn frustated...
"You're never at home and I need someone whose willing to stay at home with his family."
...So ladies why the @#$@$@ do you want me to lead a married life when I'm single?
They don't.
It's an excuse. They aren't willing to tell you what the real, underlying reason is why they're not into you--it's a means of avoiding confrontation (it's not you, it's the circumstances).
Their loss...someone else's gain. Live YOUR life and move on.
Sparky
...when PlatyMan's away, I get to play!...
Edited by PlatypusMan, 09 May 2007 - 08:00 AM.
#6
Posted 09 May 2007 - 08:15 AM
Ok I've heard this 3 times now and am getting pretty damn frustated...
"You're never at home and I need someone whose willing to stay at home with his family."
...So ladies why the @#$@$@ do you want me to lead a married life when I'm single?
They don't.
It's an excuse. They aren't willing to tell you what the real, underlying reason is why they're not into you--it's a means of avoiding confrontation (it's not you, it's the circumstances).
Their loss...someone else's gain. Live YOUR life and move on.
Sparky
...when PlatyMan's away, I get to play!...
I agree....Platy just beat me to the post. People change and accomodate when they start dating someone, and they know this because they do it to!! Move it along, there is nothing to see here, move it along!
beachbunny@singledivers.com
"Be the change you wish to see in the world"
Ghandi
#7
Posted 09 May 2007 - 09:01 AM
#8
Posted 09 May 2007 - 11:50 AM
"A good marriage is like an interlocking neurosis, where the rocks in one person's head fill up the holes in the other's."
#9
Posted 09 May 2007 - 11:56 AM
I agree with the responses so far. I gave up trying to accomodate objections. I've had the same responses just because I have an odd work schedule (work weekends, mid-week days off). I'm not about to go back to 9-5 M-F office work just to please someone. My response to the ones who expect me to be a home-body is "bye, have a nice life!" FWIW, I do enjoy vegging out at home on occasion, but only on occasion. But mostly, I would rather be diving (or something).
I'm not looking at changing just trying to figure out what the hell they're thinking. (Yeah I know the worst mistake a guy can make...)
#10
Posted 09 May 2007 - 01:45 PM
I have the same issue. I am busy.. I like to be busy.
I make plans to do things with friends and family and try very hard to not break any plans.
I had a guy ask me out a few years ago.. he couldn't believe that he had to wait over a week for me to fit him in.
I wasn't being difficult he just ask me during a very busy time.
Between my work, work, dive plans and family plans the first free night I had was almost 2 weeks from the time he ask me out.
When he got upset it was a clear sign that he was not a guy I could date.
He even gave me a lecture on how did I expect to have a man in my life if I refused to make time for one.
I wasted no time in telling him that it was obvious that he needed a woman who could devote a lot more time to him than I could and that my life was what it was and he didn't need to wait around for me or ask me out again.
Now for a guy I am interested in or an activity I really want to do...SOMETIMES I can make adjustments.
Not always but I do when I can. I am very honest about it and don't tell lies or play games.
My life is MINE... I make time for the people and things that I care about.
If someone new comes along I will adjust to make room for them in my life.
I will not sit at home and do nothing while I wait and I will not dump my friends or activities to please a man.
A quality person understands this and does not expect or demand it from another.
Now if you are dating and all of a sudden the other person has no time for you and it continues for a period of time that is another story...
Sorry for the rant but it really annoys me when I hear stories like this one...
Formerly known as gis_gal and name tattoo'd for a small bribe!
#11
Posted 09 May 2007 - 02:02 PM
#12
Posted 09 May 2007 - 03:10 PM
I can currently choose between being unhappy at home
There is the problem. Don't be unhappy. A woman will not make you happy, she can add to your happiness, but she can't make you happy. If you are not happy with yourself, you show you aren't happy and women aren't going to want to be with you. Start being happy and they'll see you as someone with whom they'd like to spend time.
DSSW,
WWW™
#13
Posted 09 May 2007 - 03:24 PM
I can currently choose between being unhappy at home
There is the problem. Don't be unhappy. A woman will not make you happy, she can add to your happiness, but she can't make you happy. If you are not happy with yourself, you show you aren't happy and women aren't going to want to be with you. Start being happy and they'll see you as someone with whom they'd like to spend time.
Well put Walter!
#14
Posted 09 May 2007 - 08:52 PM
Are you saying that you are truly unhappy at home or are you saying that sitting around doing nothing doesn't make you happy? There is a big difference.I can currently choose between being unhappy at home
There is the problem. Don't be unhappy. A woman will not make you happy, she can add to your happiness, but she can't make you happy. If you are not happy with yourself, you show you aren't happy and women aren't going to want to be with you. Start being happy and they'll see you as someone with whom they'd like to spend time.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
Stopping by Woods - Robert. Frost
#15
Posted 10 May 2007 - 06:48 AM
Are you saying that you are truly unhappy at home or are you saying that sitting around doing nothing doesn't make you happy? There is a big difference.
Ah you hit the nail on the head. I'm not actually unhappy. I'd just rather not be there right now . I have better things to do then sitting at home wasting my life watching TV.
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