5 replies to this topic

[WreckWench]

Subject: Tips from a Rapist -

A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on
what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting
facts:

1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle.They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, braid or hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for
women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors to cut clothing. ( baggy overalls, elastic waist shorts and sweat pants)

3) They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through
a purse or doing other activities while walking.

4) The time of day men are most likely to attack and rape a woman is
in the early morning, between 5 and 8:30 A.M.

5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is
grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages. Number three is public restrooms.

6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a
woman and quickly move her to a second location.

7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year
sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.

8) If you put up a fight, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it.

9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,
or other objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to use them.

10) If someone is following behind you on a street, in a garage, elevator or stairwell, look him in the face and ask a question, like what
time is it, or make general small talk, I can't believe it is so cold out
or we're in for a bad winter. Now you've seen the face and could
identify him in a lineup, you lose appeal as a target.

11) If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of
you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said
they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back.

12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate, yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY = and hold it out.

13) If someone grabs you, you can't beat him with strength but you
can outsmart him. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind,
pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in
the inner thigh -- HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told
him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it hurts.

14) After the initial hit, always go for the groin. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble.

15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two
fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

16) Always be aware of your surroundings, and if you see any
odd behavior, don't dismiss it; go with your instincts. You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel worse if the guy really was trouble.

[Sophia]

On a related note, mentally women recover much quicker if they fight back during a rape.

[Dejah]

I have heard that if you feel at all threatened by someone who approaches you talk really loud or scream so you can attract attention to the situation and always be aware of your surroundings...

[Ishie]

"Subject: Tips from a Rapist"

I know I'm late on this thread but felt compelled to comment. I think this list is covered on snopes.com but while it means well, there's quite a bit of advice on it that does not occur in the majority of rape cases, so assuming it's true could potentially get someone hurt.


"1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle.They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, braid or hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets. "

Though rape is often an opportunistic crime, since it is a crime of power, the rapist will generally target whatever his "thing" is, whether it's short haired brunettes because they remind him of his ex or elderly women who allow him to work out his power issues with his mom. Hair grab is one way of grabbing someone, but probably not the most common because it doesn't allow good control over the victim.

"2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for
women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors to cut clothing. ( baggy overalls, elastic waist shorts and sweat pants)"

Again, not necessarily, and I would imagine overalls would be one of the most unpleasant things to get someone out of other than a 7 mil wetsuit.

"3) They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through
a purse or doing other activities while walking. "

This one's true. Also, grocery store parking lots at night where women get in the car, and with the door open, turn their back to the street and begin adjusting their purchases, purse, or whatever, in the passenger seat.

"4) The time of day men are most likely to attack and rape a woman is
in the early morning, between 5 and 8:30 A.M. "

Statistically, evening is most likely.

"7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year
sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years. "

This is the really dangerous one. Studies taken from rape cases (interviewing the vics, not the ones caught) show the rate of having a weapon to be considerably higher, so there is actually a pretty good chance that an attacker will have a weapon.

"8) If you put up a fight, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it. "

Same problem. This could end up being dangerous advice, particularly if the individual is armed, plus almost anything can become a weapon in a hurry. There are character profiles on rapists. Some types of rapists are easily discouraged by a hard mark. Women (or children in the cases of abductors) who even yell and create a scene are likely to be left alone. Other types of rapists see running from a fighting or yelling woman as being a challenge to their power and are more likely to severely injure or kill the woman as well as raping her and will be more likely to pursue her because pride has been wounded.

This isn't to say don't fight. The situation and personalities dictate the response. I would find it difficult not to do ANYthing, but do not fight simply with the expectation that a bit of conflict will get the assumed unarm rapist away.

I read an article that stated if the actual rape has become inevitable (horrible horrible situation), one way to minimize the chance of severe injury or death is to continue talking, calmly if possible, saying your name, that you're frightened, that people are expecting you home, anything that constantly reinforces to the rapist that you are a person, and makes you harder to objectify. Of course, if you run across the rare but frightening sadistic rapist (one category), no dice.

"12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate, yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY = and hold it out."

Don't know the statistics on that, but I wouldn't do this. I carry tear gas that is powerful enough to burn a guy through Levi's and incapacitate him (vomiting) for an hour. I count on the element of surprise. If I yell I have it, I have to make darn sure I have it, it's pointing the right way, and all of that, and gives him an opportunity to try and take it from me (same problem with gun). If I feel threatened, I surrepticiously pull it out and hold it in position. If he grabs me, he hopefully won't know what hit him.

"13) If someone grabs you, you can't beat him with strength but you
can outsmart him. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind,
pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in
the inner thigh -- HARD."

This is a good one, but it only works once. Be prepared to run. If you're still around, he knows the trick, and he's mad.

"14) After the initial hit, always go for the groin. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble."

Rapists often expect women to do this and guard. If you get a direct hit, he's incapacitated. My favorite trick is to bring your knee up like you're aiming for the groin, which will cause him to turn his knee into protect it. Knife kick out from that position straight into the side of his knee and THEN kick him in the groin. Even if you miss, he can't chase you.

Like I said, sorry for the late response and hijack, but particularly with the weapon and fighting tips, it's good to know the odds. If you do a google search on psych profiles of rapists, I would also encourage all other women to gain a basic familiarity with the basic profiles of types of rapists. Identifying the Casanova rapist versus the sadistic rapist in the early stage of the attack could be the difference between life and death.

Ishie

[Fouch]

I noticed one thing that was not mentioned at all here...and from my experiences as a firefighter/medic for the city of Houston. Every rape case I have had to respond to (and there have been quite a few and not just women being raped) has occured in the late evening, and all were alone. Parking lots, jogging paths, public restrooms, and even in the vic's home. Every victim was alone at the time. If you are home and an intruder comes in, you are hard pressed to deter him, being he probably has been planning the event for awhile, but the others....DON'T GO OUT LATE ALONE!!!

[steelemagnolia6]

Ladies this is one thing that none of us likes to think about. In a way we are our own worst enemies. Because we want to "trust"and that is how many predators are able to make their move.

With the increasing "internet dating" that is going on. We must take precautions, while most of them seem to be ones that we have heard over and over but they bear repeating.

1. never have a blind date or internet date pick you up at your home, or office. meet him at a public place. And You pick the place. Somewhere that you are familar with.

2. Never give him your home phone number.

3. Arrange to have a friend drop in on your date. Or at the very least call and see if you are alright. Be sure that you have some phrase or word that will tip them off if things are not going well.

I'm sure that all of us have a list of nevers.

A self defense class is a good idea. Women need to know how to defend themselves. You must learn to depend on yourself for you own defense.