I’ve been biting my tongue on this for a while. But this question always gets me. The absolute truth is that women don’t want nice guys. I know, it sounds like a broad generalization, but it’s mostly true. I know because I fall in this category. What makes me think that I’m a “nice guy?” Well, it’s because after dating a women, I normally get the “you’re a nice guy, and I want to stay friends” speech. But here is the kicker, they REALLY do want to stay friends. In fact, most of my ex’s still call to tell me about their current “favor of the week jerk boyfriends.” Then, to twist the knife in my back, I get the “why can’t I find a nice guy like you?” Then, after I explain to them that I’m here, they retort with either, “but I don’t want to lose our friendship,” or “I’m just not attracted to you in that way.”
Aha! You too? I thought I was the only one...
Seriously, it has gotten so frustrating after all the online dating searches, volunteering to try to meet new people, and even considering some of my church friends, that I finally resorted to international dating. It was the only place I could find a woman (actually, a whole bunch of them) that still had traditional values like mutual respect and caring that I have been looking for, along with a strong desire for family and children. Let's face it, at 35 if I want to have a couple of kidlets of my own, I gotta get on the stick. If there are any women in the US who get it, I haven't met them and have given up hope of ever finding one. Besides, there's this cute little English professor in Belarus...
Just like Moose, I'm so tired of being such a good friend. I want more than that. I want a wife, a lover, a mother to my children, a partner, a confidant, a soulmate, a critic when I need one, and a cheerleader when I need one of those, too. I can't tell you how many profiles I've read that state their desire to find a great guy like me, only to get deafening silence when I attempted to initiate contact. Action speaks much louder that words, baby. Don't tell me you want such a great guy. Show me. I am absolutely fed up with women who profess to be serious about long term relationships, then run away screaming in terror at the mere thought of mentioning the word "marriage". I don't even have to say it. I just have to think it a little too loud.
So if I'm such a great catch, why am I still sitting here with no one but my cats to keep me company? Ah, forget it. I'll just keep writing and calling my new friend in Belarus. At least she isn't afraid of the "M" word.
Cheers!
Jim
Edited by jholley309, 27 December 2006 - 09:26 PM.