121 replies to this topic

[jextract]

Wow, Gar ... if she has to think about it......

[Blublood]

Wow, Gar ... if she has to think about it......

The way things have been going for me I would have to consider "thinking about it" as at least second base!

[TheSassyRabbit]

Wow, Gar ... if she has to think about it......

Hhmm... the alternative was a resounding NO! however, having met Gar in Houston last year, I would have hated to make a hasty decision

And yes, I really do think dating kinda sucks.....Not so bad if you go out with someone you already kinda know....But the whole "Hey you wanna go out with me?" Then the big put on for the evening kinda leaves a bad taste in my mouth.... I don't mean that literally...just a figure of speech!!! LOL Need to find that
in-between somewhere....

I'm with ya man. I hate having to ask "you wanna go out with me"? Kidding. Actually it's been a long time since I've asked a man out. I figure men men are better at the rejection factor for some reason (uh oh... I feel an entirely new post coming on about women asking men out). Anyway, back to the topic... which was.... oh yah.... but really, while the dating part is necessary to find out whether you are a longer term match with someone, I wish I could jump from the initial dance to the totally comfortable part of the relationship and go from there. Like a first date in jeans and a sweatshirt or something (uh oh... I feel another new string... what's your ideal first date... or first 3 dates....). Maybe it should be a rule: No first date. All dates start at date #3 or 5 or something.

[Walter]

I'm against the entire concept of "asking someone out." A much better approach is to plan something you want to do and do it. Invite someone to accompany you.

Example : I'm going diving tomorrow. You should come along.

If they come, you have interesting company while doing something you enjoy. If they don't, you're still doing something you enjoy. Either way, you're happy and having fun. It beats the hell out of the traditional approach.

[hnladue]

But then how to you know if you're a 'couple' if someone doesn't 'ask them out'??? Walters way is more like friends just hanging out together, where if someone 'asks me out' then we are a couple..... Am I stupid?

[Walter]

how do you know if you're a 'couple' if someone doesn't 'ask them out'???

Sexual tension.

[WreckWench]

But then how to you know if you're a 'couple' if someone doesn't 'ask them out'??? Walters way is more like friends just hanging out together, where if someone 'asks me out' then we are a couple..... Am I stupid?

Also depends on when you want to be a couple? .....(wrote then edited a bunch of crap)....

Nope Walter is right...if there is sexual tension on BOTH sides...you are a couple...if not...you are friends!

[Blublood]

Wow, Gar ... if she has to think about it......

Hhmm... the alternative was a resounding NO! however, having met Gar in Houston last year, I would have hated to make a hasty decision

Damn Sassy....I think I'm blushing...That was very nice of you....And ya if you like.....As Walter says...Next time I'm in Houston we can go do something together! Like..... go out to dinner and a movie...Ohhh...that would be a date wouldn't it??

[hnladue]

But then how to you know if you're a 'couple' if someone doesn't 'ask them out'??? Walters way is more like friends just hanging out together, where if someone 'asks me out' then we are a couple..... Am I stupid?

Also depends on when you want to be a couple? .....(wrote then edited a bunch of crap)....

Nope Walter is right...if there is sexual tension on BOTH sides...you are a couple...if not...you are friends!

ok then... how do you know if there's sexual tension?? For me.... until I'm asked (I'm old fashioned) I would ignore any kind of lust and what not or whatever 'sexual tension' is until I KNOW for sure. Not jumping at this one, for some 'fling' in the woods with someone whos just looking to punch his score card.

[cmt489]

Trust me, you WILL know if there is sexual tension!!

[Neptuner]

Yeah... us men aren't exactly good at hiding it. Nor do we want to. My first rule in life is simple... if you don't ask a girl to dance, you're probably not going to be doing much dancin'. This applies to many aspects of life.

[WreckWench]

But then how to you know if you're a 'couple' if someone doesn't 'ask them out'??? Walters way is more like friends just hanging out together, where if someone 'asks me out' then we are a couple..... Am I stupid?

Also depends on when you want to be a couple? .....(wrote then edited a bunch of crap)....

Nope Walter is right...if there is sexual tension on BOTH sides...you are a couple...if not...you are friends!

ok then... how do you know if there's sexual tension?? For me.... until I'm asked (I'm old fashioned) I would ignore any kind of lust and what not or whatever 'sexual tension' is until I KNOW for sure. Not jumping at this one, for some 'fling' in the woods with someone whos just looking to punch his score card.

IF you intiated something like Walter suggested which by the way is a really great way for a girl to ask a guy out...looks less like a date and if they are busy or can't go it isn't really rejection...but lets say you ask someone to join you doing something or they ask you. If you have a good time and he wants to do it again, more then likely he'll ask you out in a more traditional fashion. Then you know he wants to 'date' and the rest should be easy for you. If he asks if you want to join him to do 'something' again then decide if you want to do it yes or no and if you want to do it with him. If the answer is yes to both...then go 'do something' again. Still not a date. Continue this process until 1. he shows romantic interest 2. He asks you out on a date that he will specify as a date or 3. You no longer want to spend time with him.

When he shows romantic interest then you can ask if he is caught up in the moment or if he wants to start dating? However if you just enjoy it for what its worth cuz he probably NEVER would have asked you to join him to do anything if he wasnt' interested in the first place and even less likely to keep asking you if he wasn't enjoying your company and getting more interested.

You will soon know if he is interested in you or not! Time will tell if he is really interested in you as a person or just your body.

Signed...WW wretched advice to the love scorned!

[drdiver]

But what happens after the sexual tension has been relieved?

Are we no longer a couple?

But then the sexual tension may grow even greater until it reaches some plateau or there is an explosion.

I can see many interesting permutations to this concept of the sexual tension coupling...........er couple.

[rockhound1971]

so is sexual tension possible remotely (i.e. over the net>)?

I think its funny that your not actually make the decision, but you're gratious enough to allow us to make it,

Continue this process until 1. he shows romantic interest 2. He asks you out on a date that he will specify as a date or 3. You no longer want to spend time with him.

And I wouldn't be dancin if i didn't say I thought the exploration of sexual tension is perhaps my one of my favorite parts of the whole affair

[drdiver]

You are right my friend. That is one of the best parts.

And yes, I do think it is possible over the Internet.

Rock on!!!