90 replies to this topic

[ScubaCutie]

I've been using several of the online dating sites and my biggest complaint is that so many non-divers seem to reply to my profile. They don't even lie and say they are interested in diving.

Does anyone have any helpful ideas on using them more effectively or what to avoid? How about profile ideas? What kind of profile works better? And does anyone ever really read them?

[annasea]

How adamant are you being in your profile in stating that you're only interested in receiving replies from men who dive?


BTW, seeing that this is your first post...

ScubaCutie!

Texas frequently has Happy Hours organized and attended by members of SD. You just might find the diver of your dreams at one!

Edited by annasea, 25 September 2005 - 03:01 PM.

[Brinybay]

Best way to use them is don't. Lots of married guys looking to cheat, and as you've discovered already, don't know how to read. Get out and join a local dive club, must be some around you somewhere.

[ScubaDadMiami]

You might even meet someone in a place like this. At least here, you will know that he is a diver.

Your chances will go up by uploading your picture and completing your profile, too.

[casematic]

I've been using several of the online dating sites and my biggest complaint is that so many non-divers seem to reply to my profile. They don't even lie and say they are interested in diving.

I met someone that way and was assured that my diving wasn't going to be any problem at all...... but it turned out to be a HUGE problem. They didn't want to learn... they didn't want to go... and they didn't want me to go either.... And I don't go on that many trips. Ideally I would find a partner who was interested in diving as well (or was at least supportive of my interest in it). Needless to say, that relationship has since fizzled (there were other problems too, so it wasn't just diving...I don't think we were entirely that compatible to begin with now that I look back at things)

I tend to agree with the comments by brinybay.... people aren't always honest on their ads (or replies) ... I think there may be 'scammers' on both sides of the gender pool 'on-line'...people looking to cheat or just have a casual fling .... and people looking for one thing while presenting entirely another. It may be a while before I wet my feet in the 'online' dating scene again (probably never). But then for every few horror stories, there is the 'success story'. So who knows, I may go back for a second butt kicking.

Good luck in whichever route you take... Seems that dive club would be the best way to meet people with that same interest though.... Wish there were a more active local one here.

KC

[Latitude Adjustment]

I gave up on online dating sites. I stated "I only date divers and was looking for someone who would like to explore the world from the deck of a sailboat".
I got replies and lies from women who never dove or snorkeled once but found they were affraid of the fish, women affraid of the water, women who said they wanted to try it (my ex told me that too and I found she was affraid to be out on the boat at night) and woman from Russia telling me how beautiful it was in St. Petersburg in perfect English but when I asked if they ever dove didn't know what I was talking about.
Cutie, you have a better chance of finding Mr. Right on a SD trip or happy hour.

[Brinybay]

I tend to agree with the comments by brinybay.... people aren't always honest on their ads (or replies) ... I think there may be 'scammers' on both sides of the gender pool 'on-line'...

Yes, there most certainly are. I met too many of the female gender that were golddiggers, cheaters, and psychos. The old-fashioned method (get out and do things) may be less convenient, but it works.

[Brinybay]

...and woman from Russia...

Yeah, them too!

[drbill]

I met too many of the female gender that were golddiggers, cheaters, and psychos.

I kept most of those away by stating in my profile that I was a poor starving marine biologist and underwater videographer in search of a SCUBA diving sugar momma. Hmmm... come to think of it, I kept almost all the women on-line away.

Oh, and the one Russian woman I actually met was a sweetheart. I featured Julija as the brainy (and drop dead gorgeous) Russian marine biologist in my cable TV episode "In Search of the Elusive Black Sea Bass."

As for on-line dating. When you live on a somewhat geographically isolated island, resorting to them may be a realistic option. I did meet a number of nice ladies, but none of them made my heart go pitter patter (well, maybe one). Maybe it was when the check came and I asked how they were paying for their half of dinner (just kidding, I paid for everything whether dinner or just coffee).

Edited by drbill, 25 September 2005 - 07:04 PM.

[Brinybay]

Oh, and the one Russian woman I actually met was a sweetheart.

I'm sure she was, but the big difference was she was "over here". I was referring to the ones still in the Ukraine looking for a green card and ticket to the USA.

[finGrabber]

I think there is dishonesty on both sides! And there are people who set really high expectations, in general. I remember having a phone conversation with a guy; it was the "blind date" kinda thing...and I remember him saying, during a pause in conversation, "gee, the uncomfortable lul!" I thought at the time that he could have at least contributed in some way!

Oh well, I think meeting people, women and men, with similar interests is the way to go, 'Cutie

[drbill]

...the big difference was she was "over here".  I was referring to the ones still in the Ukraine looking for a green card and ticket to the USA.

Julija was just visiting here when I met her. She returned to Russia. If she were looking for a way to get a green card, she never made any attempt to get me to help her (unless you count looking at me with her beautiful eyes).

ScubaCutie... what on-line sites are you on? I've only used Match.com (no longer) and date.com (more for "entertainment" these days). By the way, I'm not suggesting we meet up there... unless you need a father figure to adopt you!

Edited by drbill, 25 September 2005 - 10:54 PM.

[Twinklez]

cable TV episode "In Search of the Elusive Black Sea Bass."

Bill...you finished it? I didn't know...would love to see it!

[Twinklez]

Been there...done that too! Still do actually. I meet lots of men online, but have only met a few in person.

Online "you can be anybody you want to be." A man that I met once told me that the first and last night I met him face to face. Online he was outgoing, arrogant and very flirty. Face to face he was very shy and almost seemed as though he felt undeserving of my company. When he finally got up the courage to say that he really liked me, he vanished into thin air. I figure he was afraid I'd find out something about him that I might not like when in fact, I liked the person I met face to face better than the guy I knew online.

My point is be careful! You can get hurt just a badly in an online relationship as you can in person.

I agree with the previous statements that if you really want to meet someone who dives then start diving with local clubs, take group trips, take an Advanced class if you haven't already. Look for local online communities as well as SD. Involve yourself with other divers as a friend and it may just turn out that the love of your life is already blowing bubbles next to you.

Me...I've contemplated very seriously disabling my online profiles. I really don't think I'm ready to give my heart away again, and want someone who is a best friend first anyway. The best way for me to find that person is to do what I just said above...dive with friends! That being said, I'm wasting valuable diving time chatting online at all the wrong sites.

Twinklez

[ScubaHawk]

I tried one, once. I filled out all the questionnaires and got back a reply that sad:
"Sorry but in a small percentage of cases etc. . . ." Basically -- we wouldn't want to match any of our members with you. Now my goal is to be the first lifetime member of SD

P.S. Hah - it's their loss!

Edited by ScubaHawk, 26 September 2005 - 12:00 AM.