128 replies to this topic

[kevininpo]

But, (ah yes you knew there was a "but" coming didn't you)
 
I'm 5'2" tall.  I get laid first I'm a"liberated" women  If a women could handle the problem, I would do it myself.

[ShamuLovesMe]

Oh my GOD! Sandy, are you single? If so, I want to marry you!

Oh wait, I guess I have to get in line behind Tolly and Kammy.

It's refreshing to see a "traditional" perspective like this. And ladies, Sandy's not trying to keep you down, to each her own. But I think a significant percentage of men and women get satisfaction from doing their "traditional" roles in a relationship. I, for example, hate cooking but will gladly do the dishes every night if you cook for me; I hate cleaning house, but will happily wash the cars and fix stuff; I hate shopping, but will pay the bills without question if you do so.

[steelemagnolia6]

It is rather nice to know in this day and age that there are men who think that they should be men and women who think that they should be women. Some of us still long for the old days....

I have learned along this road that we call life to be self sufficent. Not that I can't appreicate someone who wants to take care of the guy stuff so that i don't break my nails..... lol... Yes I am a girlie girl.... My ex SO would tell you that I drove him nuts being susie homemaker at the same time that I'd go insane if he touched my car. I am anal about my car, sort of like guys are but the back seat of mine is filled with junk everything goes in to the back seat, dive stuff, shoes, and just plain junk....

Now if I could find a guy that likes to be pampered and and spoiled who returns the same treatment, can put up with the fact that my novel takes up a lot of my free time that is not taken up diving. Can understand that I am a clown, and that my friends are as important to me my shoes are (and let me tell you shoes are my one wastefull unjustifable expense). If I tell ya I love ya more than my shoes you know that you mean one heck of a lot to me. I might consider keeping him letting him keep me as a pet.

Hey I could be a pet... well maybe....

[ScubaPunk]

But, (ah yes you knew there was a "but" coming didn't you)
 
I'm 5'2" tall.  I get laid first I'm a"liberated" women  If a women could handle the problem, I would do it myself

.

No wonder men and women don't understand each other.

Oh my GOD! Sandy, are you single? If so, I want to marry you! 

Oh wait, I guess I have to get in line behind Tolly and Kammy.

Well I was expecting to get flamed, not marriage proposals You guys are all too kind to me. Maybe there's still a chance I won't be single forever.

[Cold_H2O]

I was raised to believe my role was wife/mother/homemaker. I was shocked when I got divorced and found myself having to become a liberated gal.
I ended up working in a male dominated field and quickly learned (yes the hard way) that Susie homemaker gets no respect in the work place. "hey sweety you gonna go an make us some fresh coffee".. Is a comment I heard daily.. I was hired to draft hydraulic power units not make coffee for the men..or be cute and sweet. I am currently working drafting marine and industrial engines and power generators. I have found it difficult to be taken seriously when I am a girlie girl at work.
I love it when a man opens doors for me and don't mind the traditional roles.
I love to cook and the last boyfriend still calls me up requesting pies and cookies..
I guess for me it is not feasible to be to traditional right now. I am single, own a house. Currently not dating anyone, so I can't wait for the man to come over and fix things.
But if any guy out there wants to come to Seattle and fix stuff at my place I would be more than happy to cook dinner and do the dishes..

[Blublood]

I don't like anyone washing my laundry but me. If it gets ruined I have no one to blame but me...

You can ruin laundry?

[steelemagnolia6]

yes my dear you can. I have seen some of my sweaters come out shrank down to a size that would fit well a kid after my ex got a hold fo them. So I perfer not to have mine touch by hands other than mine or the dry cleaners... I don't mind doing the guys laundry I have fits if I see shirts just thrown on a hanger without being ironed first... the former SO says that his stuff never looked better because Kay believes in an iron and starch...

oK I confess to being a man spoiler.... but I am soooooooo good at it....

[Walter]

You can ruin laundry?

My brother (not Dennis, one of the others) turned all my white clothes pink.

[steelemagnolia6]

see why I don't wnat a man to wash my clothes you don't sort....

[drbill]

Having been unmarried my entire life, I've had to assume "both" roles in my household. None have been gender specific.

I wash my own clothes. Of course I mix both colors and whites, and I have no "delicates" so I get everything clean without damage. The only time my white clothes have turned pink is when "she" washed for me. When I'm with a woman, I don't particularly care if I wash hers too... but prefer it if she does so she has them cleaned the way she likes. Besides, I prefer playing with her "delicates" after they're washed!

I cook (well, kind of... but I've kept myself healthy over the decades), wash dishes, water the plants, vacuum, dust, sweep, etc. I bought a condo so I didn't have to worry about cutting the lawn, gardening or painting the exterior. That way I can do extended dive travel.

When I am with a woman (sigh, soon I hope), we share tasks according to our specific preferences. With some we alternated cooking, with others she cooked and I washed dishes. I do generally end up taking out the garbage (and recyclables).

Of course my ultimate goal single or "attached" is to minimize tasks so I/we have more time for play... like diving!

Dr. Bill

[steelemagnolia6]

where have you been all my life???

[Walter]

see why I don't want a man to wash my clothes you don't sort....

I do, he doesn't.

[drdiver]

I sort all my clothes. And I use Woolite. I don't do much ironing. Because of my job, a lot of clothes (mostly shirts) get taken to the dry cleaner where I get a good press and starch. I love to cook (would love to cook for a bunch of SDs) and it shows down below Don't like vacuuming and mopping much. My new house has all hardwood floors and ceramic tile (do not like carpet--dirt magnet) and is much easier to keep clean. Haven't lived with a woman in awhile and I sometimes wonder how set I've gotten in my ways and how adaptable I would be in that regard.

[cmt489]

I think what is important is that there is a division of labour in the relationship and how that labour is divided is between the two parties involved. With my ex-husband I was left doing everything (literally) which is where resentment begins to build. I was the only one working full time (in a 2 1/2 year marriage he was unemployed for almost a year), I did the house work (luckily I have a cleaning lady so it was not as bad as it could be), cooked dinner, took care of the cat and dog, dealt with all of the finances, washed and vacuumed the car (not once did he ever wash the car), dealt with plants and fixed anything that went wrong in the home (we lived in a condo so there was no yard work) and did the laundry. While he was unemployed he did grocery shop but that was about it.

After we separated my work load went down significantly and my home always looked better. Now I am in a relationship where he also loves to cook (so we cook for each other), loves my dog so we share walking responsibilities and loves to go grocery shopping. He even knows how to separate laundry and hang things. The only thing he does not do is bake, which is my department. I don't ever feel obligated to do something or that I am not being appreciated. This is the most important thing in a relationship, IMHO.

[drdiver]

I don't ever feel obligated to do something or that I am not being appreciated. This is the most important thing in a relationship, IMHO.

That is absolutely true. In my 25 year marriage, we had a very traditional relationship, I worked, she stayed home and took care of kids and home. I did all the home maintenance except yard work. But I always made a point regularly of letting her know that her work was appreciated and was, in fact, much more important than mine. Also, I always let her know that I was always willing to do chores around the house, but because she was in charge of the house, she had to tell me what she wanted me to do. The problems in the marriage came from issue outside of division of responsibilities. But I won't get into that here.