94 replies to this topic

[cmt489]

Toilets are designed with seats and lids that go down. Use them.

...and that also keeps the dog out of it too...

In our house it is the cat who is the biggest culprit.

[Moose]

In our house it is the cat who is the biggest culprit.

Doesn't the "C" in CMT489 stand for Cat?

I know how you use your tounge!

[bowjunkie]

Interesting ,I read this thread twice and not once did I see the biggest relationship breaker out there mentioned ...If your with someone that means all others are not one nite stands... if ya want to fool around get single don't destroy your SO just to have a good time for a nite

how to keep your mate : like its worked for me lol

its the simple things: a note on the mirror saying have a great day

a simple picnic with a nice bottle of wine in a small meadow in the mountians watching the sun set

breakfast in bed on special occasions "birthdays anniversaries" ect.

the sound of a bull elk bugle on a frosty fall morning at 10,000 ft

laying on a deserted beach watching a meteor shower

a trip to see the northern lights " one of the worlds most facinating things to see"

and the best (Charlie Pride ) said it in a song "youve got to kiss an angel good morning and let her know you think about her when your gone "


ok I'll quit rambling now


Ed

[finGrabber]

breakfast in bed on special occasions "birthdays anniversaries" ect.

Every day you're with your SO is a special occasion

[Sotocanoguy]

I know I am a new guy here but this one struck a nerve. I have a few fresh items to add to the list.

Don't get married because the sex is AWESOME!
Let your past stay the past.
Don't ask about thier past relationships either. You really don't want to know.
Extended work trips. (6 months or more)
Not deciding who gets to wear the pants when it comes to the bank accounts.
In-laws
Maintaining contact with ex's.

There are a ton more but this thread makes me a sad panda.

[WreckWench]

I know I am a new guy here but this one struck a nerve. I have a few fresh items to add to the list.

Don't get married because the sex is AWESOME!
Let your past stay the past.
Don't ask about thier past relationships either. You really don't want to know.
Extended work trips. (6 months or more)
Not deciding who gets to wear the pants when it comes to the bank accounts.
In-laws
Maintaining contact with ex's.

There are a ton more but this thread makes me a sad panda.

Those are certainly deal breakers and relationship ruiners. I'm sad you had to learn them the hard way. And I'm sad you are a 'sad panda'.

Here is a little uplifter here and here!

[drbill]

Yep, don't ask about former relationships. That is generally NOT a good question to ask... as my former date, Tifo, discovered when she asked about mine. She couldn't handle one that was a bit unconventional (well it was a man and a woman) but honest and open.

Heck, I'd get married even if the sex were mediocre... at least I'd be getting some!

As for maintaining contact with my "ex's," I would worry about a woman so insecure about our relationship that she couldn't trust me and realize that once a person enters my life in a meaningful way, they stay a part of it. I don't fool around with "ex's." Heck, I don't fool around with anybody these days.

It seems so many have such idealistic expectations about their partners. I've found the very best ones have been the ones I've previously established good solid friendships with. I think friendships that evolve into something "more" establish some of the best relationships. That's why many of my "ex's" are still in touch even after decades.

As for my own unrealistic expectations, I've decided that the woman of my dreams would: look and act like Gong Li, dive like Jessica Alba, have her own private jet and a trust fund to operate it... Do I sense I may remain single for the rest of my life???

[Sotocanoguy]

That was kind of what I meant by extended trips. Out of four years of marriage we were only together for about 18 months.

I have a new one, telling everyone you know that you and your SO just had a huge fight about something really dumb and sharing it with everyone you know.

[WreckWench]

Living in a different city (correction state) from your husband.

Not always...it can work but both parties have to be willing to make it work. I live in TX and my new husband lives in SC. We both grew up military brats and had fathers that did long stints away from us...it was part of life. (Heck its why we used to have week long birthday celebrations...Birthday Monday, Birthday Tuesday etc. He was usually home near our birthday but not always ON our birthday. This way he was with us during our birthday week at some point. We never knew everyone didn't do it that way until much later on in life.)

In any event...we met long distance, courted long distance and are now living apart long distance until my house sells in TX.

But neither of us feels sorry for ourselves...in fact we are BLESSED that we are only 1 hour timezone difference and not half way around the world from each other. We can call multiple times a day and not just when the phone is available or we bhave an off moment. We can fly to see each other in the case of need or extreme want and the only obstacle is money and not permission and neither of us are being shot at or are in harm's way We sleep easily at night knowing we are safe but BOTH of us pray that the men and women who are NOT always safe stay safe so that they can return home soon to reap the efforts of all their hard work, dedication and sacrafices...you know...the way the REST OF US do on a daily basis.

So no Que...I would not say that being apart is a deal breaker/relationship killer.

OTOH sotocanoguy...being married to the military is NOT for every woman. Your struggles are more difficult which added to the problems of all relationships is just adding fuel to the fire. And maturity plays a big part in all of it. I for one have just gotten married for the FIRST time within the last year. Been engaged 3x...but both of my first two finances cheated on me before we could get to the alter. My husband was like many and got married right out of high school. He was ready but she was not. Then he rebounded on his second marriage choosing a Brady Bunch mom who also had 2 kids. Unfortunately both of his ex's left him but at least he got the kids.

Quite frankly...some people are ready for marriage at 20...and some are not ready until 40. And its a crap shoot to guess which are which when you meet them cuz EVERYONE thinks they are ready from the time they are old enough to get married.

[drbill]

I can deal with my SO living in a different state or even country. However, it is extremely difficult when they come from a different planet... say Venus vs Mars!

[damselfish]

The key to any relationship is COMMUNICATION. You have to be very open and honest about everything. A lack of communication or not listening and interrupting will cause the other person to withdraw and not be open or talk. The less you talk (about everything.. finances, fun, hobbies, goals, dreams, sex, fantasies) the more distant you become. You need to constantly ask "Are you Happy"? If not, they will find someone else to lean on and talk to.

[Sotocanoguy]

Last but not least:

Waiting until your husband is out of town and trading in his convertable Mustang GT for a honda CRV because you loved the color!!!!!

Edited by Sotocanoguy, 05 June 2008 - 06:38 PM.

[pir8]

Last but not least:

Waiting until your husband is out of town and trading in his convertable Mustang GT for a honda CRV because you loved the color!!!!!

Sounds like grounds for justifiable homicide to me.

[damselfish]

Easy, just break the TRUST. The relationship will be ruined!! ~ Damselfish