108 replies to this topic

[WreckWench]

You are most welcome Raven...its a hard time of year for break ups and even more so given its your birthday too! But hang in there and never forget that your son thinks you are the most perfect woman in the world. And sometimes...that is all you need! Bah! Humbug!! on the rest of the men in the world! -ww

[drbill]

Well, since everyone else seems to be checking in with "loves lost" perhaps it's time for me to chime in as well. After communicating for more than a year, and anticipating a meeting where the two of us would dive off into the sunset hand-in-hand (or fin-in-fin), my long-awaited meeting with Xiaoyan from Tokyo has turned out to be a romantic bust!

Have no idea what happened... she won't respond to any attempts to initiate conversation about it. It seemed the day she arrived, or definitely the day after, there was no glint of glee in her eyes. Fortunately the entire two weeks have not been in vain. We have had a good time diving together (when the hellacious winter storms here allow us to) and she has spotted two species (swell shark and round stingray) I hadn't gotten any video footage of. We had a nice trip into the rain soaked island interior (at least as far as the road closures permitted us to go).

So what I thought might be my ultimate fantastic lover has turned out to be a cautiously friendly dive buddy. Some day perhaps I'll know the reasons, or just live with the enigma.

I guess I can now write off planned visits to Tokyo and to SE Asia this spring. Hmmm... maybe South Africa, the Red Sea, the Galapagos, or...

Dr. Bill
Confused on Catalina

[Raven]

Dr. Bill

I am so sorry to hear that. I hope things at least turn back to the exciting chatter you shared before the meeting and you can build that friendship. Good luck.

R

[drbill]

Thanks, Raven... and of course best wishes for a loving relationship in your future and in the lives of the other members facing such dificulties (and opportunities for growth).

Dr. Bill

[BradfordNC]

Dr Bill,

Looks like maybe you should have gotten that ceiling repaired after all.

lol.

well, ya know what they say, when a door gets closed, there is always a window opened somewhere else.

[WreckWench]

Brad is right...when one opportunity fails...another presents itself! Just don't do as I did and blind yourself needlessly to those other opportunities!

And Dr Bill...my heart is with you as well as anyone else suffering a personal loss of this nature! -ww

Edited by WreckWench, 18 January 2005 - 08:10 AM.

[Raven]

Brad is right...when one opportunity fails...another presents itself! Just do as I did and blind yourself needlessly to those other opportunities!

And Dr Bill...my heart is with you as well as anyone else suffering a personal loss of this nature! -ww

WW, are you saying blind yourself to new opportunities for now or the " failed opportunities"?

I can say that I've had a few strong opportunities present themselves. These opportunities are looking for a long-term deep "opportunity" and while some are I am sure worth the prospect in the future I am not able to deal with any of that right now.

Unless of course a torrid affair presents itself for distraction. < OMG Did I say that out loud? she looks around to see who's listening. >



Just kidding folks. I just needed a bit of humor. Hahaha

[rockhound1971]

I was siting quietly on the couch when about three hours ago, my spider senses started tingling...i figured that I better check the website and what is it that I find...

Unless of course a torrid affair presents itself for distraction.  < OMG Did I say that out loud? she looks around to see who's listening. >

Raven, I realize that your just joking...don't worry...but i wanted to say that its funny how things go sometimes...the one thing that i'm absolutely sure of is that your never given more than you can handle on any given day...and its good to see you in humor....

I think there was a question that got asked a couple of days ago that I'd like to take a stab at....

So, where is that line between keeping things slow and getting to know one another, vs. not being willing to trust and let someone in and get hurt again? You have to do it eventually.....but what is "eventually" ? 

I'm not sure i know the exact answer, but I know this...I've been in Love (with a capital L) twice in my life. First one ended in divorce and the second one ended because i was watching my feet. You see, to me being in Love is like being in great fog...you can trust, have faith and walk straight-up through the fog, or you can cautiously watch your feet and ensure the placement of each step. I've tried it twice and all i can say is that its more fun, its more enjoyable to walk blindly...ooh I know, it hurts a hell of a lot more when you fall off the cliff, but, I think its better than staring at the ground....

[Marvel]

I have to admit, Doug, despite my caution now, I agree with you wholeheartedly. I've been in "Love" thrice & although the losses have been painful, I will never regret having felt the way I did.

[Diverbrian]

Ask around about me. I got tired of not looking where I was walking. Now I watch that ground and suspect quicksand if I see what looks like solid ground ahead. It's not as much fun, but at least I am not getting hurt nor am I watching any women around me get hurt.

I've made enough mistakes in that department over the last few years. I am not in the shape to make any more right now.

[finGrabber]

Doug,

I think your analogy was perfect!!

So many times, I have walked thru that fog only to walk into a brick wall; I have twice found the door...that door lead to much happiness but, in the end, way more pain than I would have ever thought

so, have I walked into the wall lately? Yes, and I have a bruise to show for it!...will I continue to walk thru the fog and hope to find another door?? YES, I will...with all my heart and all of my soul, I will

[WreckWench]

Brad is right...when one opportunity fails...another presents itself! Just do as I did and blind yourself needlessly to those other opportunities!

And Dr Bill...my heart is with you as well as anyone else suffering a personal loss of this nature! -ww

Hey...at least I know you all read my posts! I meant to say...

Just don't do as I did and blind yourself needlessly to those other opportunities!

[EbonyMermaid]

MURDER, SUICIDE was my first thought when this happened to me, but once I got over my felonious self-destructive mood I moved on. As cliche as it may sound time heals all wounds, you will still have a bad taste in your mouth from the experience but don't let that get in the way of you moving on and entering into another relationship after a considerable healing time. Dump the baggage before a new romance. Love yourself!!!

Yeah, I'm back!!! I missed everyone.

EB

[WreckWench]

Hey girl...we've missed you too!!! Good to see you back! I hope all the issues you were facing are more resolved if not completely gone!!! -ww

Yeah, I'm back!!! I missed everyone.

[Avin]

Wow!
This is the first topic I read because I just joined this site yesterday and the subject caught my eye.

We have all been down that road (if you haven't, you will.. trust me) and all I can say is that love hurts. You cannot protect yourself against it because by doing so, you may interfere with a "good relationship" How do you know the difference between a good relationship you ask... well, YOU DON'T!

My advice to all is live life with its ups and downs and learn from it. Whatever you decide to do will have its advantages and disadvantages. Every action has a reaction, wether it is positive or negative it depends on you.

To my fellow service member in Iraq. Keep your mind where it belongs, look out for your fellow troops as they look out for you and you will accomplish the mission.
I am not in Iraq and have never been in combat, but I am sure it should take 200% of your mind to concentrate on the task at hand. You will have plenty of time to think about this issue when you come home safe, that is if you still even remember it.

Semper Fi!
Yes, I am a Marine.